23. Getting Divorced.

       One of my biggest fears is getting divorced, AFTER losing a loved family member of course. Divorce is NOT an option, I told my (now) husband; I did not want to go through the 'This couch is mine', 'I bought the shower curtains', 'Do we flip a coin for the TV?', 'Who keeps the dogs?' discussion. We agreed on working through whatever issue it was at hand, and put the effort to fix it, or find middle ground - compromise. No, Compromise is not the same as Settling; while the first option stands for 'getting less' to receive something you want, the second option is 'making do' with less than what you deserve, or sometimes even nothing in return. 

I've asked my husband if he settled for me, and he said NO; I also offered him to explore his options before we made anything official. Once again, he said he knew what he wanted, and I was just that. We will be thirteen years together this upcoming September, and eight years married this December.

Of course, we have had our arguments, and the "D" word (or breaking up, before we married) has come up, but we take it back after we calm down. It's one of those 'heat of the moment' things we say and regret; it came up quite often that I even considered there was some truth to it. However, the husband and I have chosen to NOT consider it as an option. Don't get me wrong, I understand (and I agree) there are situations when splitting up is for the best. 

   

Wayward  &  I

Now you might wonder who the guy in the picture is, and why I added it to this post. Well, he's an indie singer from Minnesota and he came back to The Down Under this weekend. He played a few new songs and, oh boy did they get me! They were straight from dark moments, and I felt like I was there with him. By the last song, I struggled looking him in the eye, not because I'm awkward, but because tears welled up blurring my vision.

I relate to his music because he talks about things most of us go through in our everyday life, and the pursuit of Happiness. Never giving up. However, the new songs were a lot more personal/deep/painful. I wish I would've recorded that specific part of the show, but it felt more intimate, like a conversation between pals.

I can't wait for that album, but in the meantime, I suggest giving him a listen.  It's hard to choose a favorite from the album "Happiness?" but if I had to choose, I think I'll go with 'Not Settled Yet'. I think you will like it too, song and album.

                                                                                  In the meantime, you know what to do ... 

    [ ...Relax. Take it Easy... ]